A Few Headlines That Could Hit Newspapers In 2025

HEADLINES DATED 1ST JAN 2025

· President Sonia Gandhi and Prime Minister Priyanka Gandhi receive the Italian Prime Minister Rahul Gandhi

· Dhoom 17 ready for release.

· I will play next world cup - Sachin Tendulkar

· Salman, Vivek and Abhishek attend Aishwarya's 3rd marriage.

· "Mein To Ab Bhi Jawaan Hoon" - Dev Anand's new movie set for release where he plays son of Aamir Khan and Madhuri Dixit.

· After remakes of 45 films of Amitabh, Shahrukh now to play Amitabh's role in remake of "Jhoom Barabar Jhoom".

· Petrol Rs. 999/- per litre.

· Kyunki saas bhi kabhi bahu thi completed 2,50,000 episodes & Baa has completed 400yrs.

· Coach Ganguly resigns as India went out of The World Cup in 1st round after losing to Korea.

· Navjot S Siddhu will launch his own TV channel where he is the Host & the Guest too.

· Riots in Parliament as newly elected MPs Mallika Sheravat & Rakhi Sawant enter the assembly.

· Maruti launches its new Hovercraft 'SX-25'. Honda, Toyota & Tata to follow.

· A cap found in Mithi river. Sources say it belonged to a species called Himesh Reshammiya.........

Kiss 'n' Slap........................

George Bush, Manmohan Singh, Aishwarya Rai and Sonia Gandhi are travelling in a train. The train goes through a tunnel and it gets completely dark. Suddenly there is a kissing sound and then a slap! The train comes out of the tunnel. The women and Manmohan are sitting there looking perplexed. Bush is bent over holding his face, which is red from an apparent slap. All of them remain diplomatic and nobody says anything.

Sonia is thinking:
These Americans are all crazy after Aishwarya. Bush must have tried to kiss her in the tunnel. Very proper that she slapped him.

Aishwarya is thinking:
Bush must have tried to kiss me but kissed Sonia instead and got slapped.

Bush is thinking:
Damn it. Manmohan must have tried to kiss Aishwarya. She might have thought it was me and slapped me.

Manmohan is thinking:
If this train goes through another tunnel I will make another kissing sound and slap Bush again.

Doubt About Mahabharatha.........

In a remote village school in India, the teacher was telling the Mahabharata story to the 6th class students. She is at the Krishna's birth part of it.

Teacher: "Kamsa heard from the skies that his sister's 8th child was going to kill him. He was furious. He ordered to put Vasudeva and Devaki behind bars. First son is born, and Kamsa killed him by poisoning... Second one was born, and Kamsa threw him off the mountain peak. Third one was born.............
Ramu: I have a doubt (sounding nervous and confused).
Teacher: "Ramu, my dear! The whole of India doesn't have any doubt in Mahabharata, then how come you have one?"
Ramu: Teacher, if Kamsa knew that Devaki's 8th child was going to kill him, why the hell did he put Vasudeva and Devaki in the same cell?

The teacher fainted!!!!!